Turning Point will be the new arm of VCC that focuses on the local community. We are forming it as an entity with some separation from VCC so that the dream we have of delivering services to families in need will not get lost in the internal workings of the faith community. We have noticed that even in the most well intentioned churches (including ours) the pull to serve the church is so powerful that getting much done to deliver justice to those outside the church just gets missed. Our attempt to remedy this is the development of Turning Point; under the faith community but with a separate name, checking account, etc. Eventually, Turning Point, if it makes sense to do so, will become its own charitable non-profit organization.
The working vision statement for Turning Point is that families in Shoreline, North King and South Snohomish Counties have access to social services. The working mission statement is: to deliver social services by partnering with others and with special concern for those who are poor and vulnerable by providing educational, coaching, care and counseling services to families.
The vision/mission statements are very rough, but I think you get the idea. We dream that someday Turning Point will make an impact in hundreds of families that would otherwise not have access to much needed social services and that cycles of poverty, abuse, divorce, broken familial relationships, at-risk youth and many other social ills would be turned around and brought to wholeness. We will do this in partnership with other agencies and organizations for maximum impact. Next- more on Turning Point
Friday, August 26, 2005
Thursday, August 18, 2005
Our Dreams
This will be the first in a series of articles or maybe we could say conversations. Conversation implies two-way communication, so, we are going to write some short articles about our dreams, our life together, and our moving toward such and would like to hear your responses, insights, comments and questions. Each article will be listed on the sidebar of the VCC web site here http://vineyard-cc.org/# as well as on this blog. You can post any comments here. We hope you will find this a helpful way to dialogue about our community.
To begin, let’s start with some background. The last few years, through circumstances and many influences, we have become convinced that we exist to serve our world in the personal, local and global realm. We believe that followers of Jesus embrace the way of Jesus that lives pursuing their relationship with God and serving this world in tandem. To that end we encourage one another to embrace spiritual practices such as prayer, meditation, fasting, reading, gathering together, hospitality, as well as many others…in the future we will devote some articles to “spiritual practices in community”.
We dream about the myriad of ways we as a community create an environment that sees every person’s journey encouraged to serve in the three realms of mission noted above. To begin with we want to talk about our dreams in the local area.
Next - The birth of 'Turning Point'
To begin, let’s start with some background. The last few years, through circumstances and many influences, we have become convinced that we exist to serve our world in the personal, local and global realm. We believe that followers of Jesus embrace the way of Jesus that lives pursuing their relationship with God and serving this world in tandem. To that end we encourage one another to embrace spiritual practices such as prayer, meditation, fasting, reading, gathering together, hospitality, as well as many others…in the future we will devote some articles to “spiritual practices in community”.
We dream about the myriad of ways we as a community create an environment that sees every person’s journey encouraged to serve in the three realms of mission noted above. To begin with we want to talk about our dreams in the local area.
Next - The birth of 'Turning Point'
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Going Home
We leave Orcas to go home today. This stay has been very slow, lots of solitude...my sister does not have a television. It has been great to see Alex play for 10 days without a T.V. or video games! He and Nate have read books and played outside until they were covered in dirt, so fun to watch. They especially like chasing rabbits. There are so many rabbits here. They run all over the property.
We have had a very nice time here. My brother-in-law has been a most gracious host--we have named him our "Camp Director"
I usually dream a lot and remember my dreams. It's a language I have learned some about and it is definitely a way that I hear from God as well as a way of working out my life...
I haven't remembered many of my dreams the past 10 days...maybe because life has slowed to a halt there is not a lot to work out while on vacation...
Last night I had a very vivid dream. I was with Gordon Cosby from the Church of the Savior. He was giving me advice. I can't remember what he was saying but I knew I needed to pay attention. I knew he had a lot of wisdom that I needed to hear. My dream changed and I was frustrated for not asking him certain questions. I was trying to get him on the phone but was not having any luck. I remember thinking, I should write down all my questions on a sheet of paper so if I do get him on the phone I won't forget what I want to ask...end of dream
This has obvious implications to me on the surface. I visited Church of the Savior two years ago and have read several books about COS. We are in the process of trying to develop ways to incubate several mission groups. We understand that the COS structure does not translate to our context so we have been trying to figure out what does transfer. Lots of discussion, lots of reading, lots of praying for the correct structures to enable us to see our faith community serving the places of pain and need in our world...I think there is more for me, I will have to think about it...
We have had a very nice time here. My brother-in-law has been a most gracious host--we have named him our "Camp Director"
I usually dream a lot and remember my dreams. It's a language I have learned some about and it is definitely a way that I hear from God as well as a way of working out my life...
I haven't remembered many of my dreams the past 10 days...maybe because life has slowed to a halt there is not a lot to work out while on vacation...
Last night I had a very vivid dream. I was with Gordon Cosby from the Church of the Savior. He was giving me advice. I can't remember what he was saying but I knew I needed to pay attention. I knew he had a lot of wisdom that I needed to hear. My dream changed and I was frustrated for not asking him certain questions. I was trying to get him on the phone but was not having any luck. I remember thinking, I should write down all my questions on a sheet of paper so if I do get him on the phone I won't forget what I want to ask...end of dream
This has obvious implications to me on the surface. I visited Church of the Savior two years ago and have read several books about COS. We are in the process of trying to develop ways to incubate several mission groups. We understand that the COS structure does not translate to our context so we have been trying to figure out what does transfer. Lots of discussion, lots of reading, lots of praying for the correct structures to enable us to see our faith community serving the places of pain and need in our world...I think there is more for me, I will have to think about it...
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Orcas is Beautiful
We arrived on Orcas Island about 4PM yesterday. What a beautiful setting! My sister's house looks across the road to West Harbor. The weather is outstanding. Rich and my brother-in-law are out hiking this a.m. Alex and Nate are chasing rabbits. There are so many rabbits on the property. I am having coffee, being quiet, and now reading through some blogs...
I brought a few books to read with me. I started with "girl meets God" by Lauren Winner. It is a memoir of a Jewish woman that converts to Christianity. Lauren has her degree in the history of American religion. Something she reports in her book, really struck me. She recounts the beginnings of Billy Graham's crusades. Lauren tells the history, "In 1957, Billy Graham held a revival in New York City...He wanted to make sure the local churches were prepared to welcome and support the converts, so...Graham and his people...met with local Christian leaders, helping to prepare New York churches to receive what Graham hoped would be a large influx of New Christians...Graham was Baptist, evangelical, in 1952 he began to reach hundreds of thousands of readers with a newspaper column...and a year before his New York crusade, he founded Christianity Today the country's leading evangelical magazine. His credentials were impeccable.
Graham's work with the local churches in NY sparked a huge controversy: Graham met with fellow evangelicals, he also worked with Catholics, liberalish Presbyterians, and others outside of the orthodox Protestant fold. In today's pluralist climate, such overtures may not sound terribly edgy, but at the time they were radical."
Graham took a lot of heat, writings came out against him, powerful conservative Christians were outraged, and they denounced the rising young evangelist. Bob Jones, John R. Rice and others. "Graham, however, stood his ground, insisting that the fighting, feuding and controversies among God's people...is a very poor example." that "God has people in all his churches," and that "the one badge of Christian discipleship is not orthodoxy, but love."
I have read or seen more of Billy Graham in the last month than in a very long time. I am sure that it is because of all the publicity he got around his last NY meetings...as I watched him interviewed and now reading this, I wonder about a few things we, the 2005 church could learn from him:
He held strong to his beliefs without condemning others (Christians) that held difference in their theology and practice...
He was very "big" he had a gift to be with people from all walks of life and faith, and these people (usually heads of governments) were drawn to him (sort of like Jesus)...
He stood his ground, with love in the midst of being accused of heresy from the very conservative wing of Christians of his time...he was accused of being too nice, too compliant...
He still to this day has impeccable credentials...
I am wondering if Billy Graham's example of inclusiveness is not an accident for those of us today that watch as an amazing cultural shift is taking place in our world...
I wonder if we too, could hold our ground in love...
I wonder if we too, could have people that differ with us be our friends...
I wonder if we too, could be accused of being too nice, too compliant when accused of not having it right...
There is a place for disagreement, there is a place for discussion of disagreements, but what I see written about brothers and sisters in Christ over the blogsphere and not face to face or even email to email, is a very sad commentary for our time...
I read so many backhanded attacks on people that are trying to faithfully live out their service to Christ...it doesn't even seem to be conservatives attacking more liberalish folk (although I see this as well), it seems to be happening in all corners of the church...
I think public critiquing has it's place, but I wonder why it can't be done with much humility and love...
Okay, my rant is over, back to vacation...
I brought a few books to read with me. I started with "girl meets God" by Lauren Winner. It is a memoir of a Jewish woman that converts to Christianity. Lauren has her degree in the history of American religion. Something she reports in her book, really struck me. She recounts the beginnings of Billy Graham's crusades. Lauren tells the history, "In 1957, Billy Graham held a revival in New York City...He wanted to make sure the local churches were prepared to welcome and support the converts, so...Graham and his people...met with local Christian leaders, helping to prepare New York churches to receive what Graham hoped would be a large influx of New Christians...Graham was Baptist, evangelical, in 1952 he began to reach hundreds of thousands of readers with a newspaper column...and a year before his New York crusade, he founded Christianity Today the country's leading evangelical magazine. His credentials were impeccable.
Graham's work with the local churches in NY sparked a huge controversy: Graham met with fellow evangelicals, he also worked with Catholics, liberalish Presbyterians, and others outside of the orthodox Protestant fold. In today's pluralist climate, such overtures may not sound terribly edgy, but at the time they were radical."
Graham took a lot of heat, writings came out against him, powerful conservative Christians were outraged, and they denounced the rising young evangelist. Bob Jones, John R. Rice and others. "Graham, however, stood his ground, insisting that the fighting, feuding and controversies among God's people...is a very poor example." that "God has people in all his churches," and that "the one badge of Christian discipleship is not orthodoxy, but love."
I have read or seen more of Billy Graham in the last month than in a very long time. I am sure that it is because of all the publicity he got around his last NY meetings...as I watched him interviewed and now reading this, I wonder about a few things we, the 2005 church could learn from him:
He held strong to his beliefs without condemning others (Christians) that held difference in their theology and practice...
He was very "big" he had a gift to be with people from all walks of life and faith, and these people (usually heads of governments) were drawn to him (sort of like Jesus)...
He stood his ground, with love in the midst of being accused of heresy from the very conservative wing of Christians of his time...he was accused of being too nice, too compliant...
He still to this day has impeccable credentials...
I am wondering if Billy Graham's example of inclusiveness is not an accident for those of us today that watch as an amazing cultural shift is taking place in our world...
I wonder if we too, could hold our ground in love...
I wonder if we too, could have people that differ with us be our friends...
I wonder if we too, could be accused of being too nice, too compliant when accused of not having it right...
There is a place for disagreement, there is a place for discussion of disagreements, but what I see written about brothers and sisters in Christ over the blogsphere and not face to face or even email to email, is a very sad commentary for our time...
I read so many backhanded attacks on people that are trying to faithfully live out their service to Christ...it doesn't even seem to be conservatives attacking more liberalish folk (although I see this as well), it seems to be happening in all corners of the church...
I think public critiquing has it's place, but I wonder why it can't be done with much humility and love...
Okay, my rant is over, back to vacation...
Monday, July 18, 2005
Vacation
We are leaving in a few minutes for vacation on Orcas Island. Rich, Alex, Nate and I are going to my sister's house. I am sure we will have a great time...looking forward to rest, relaxation, and a bunch of fun...
Last night a few of us celebrated Erin's birthday. Erin is somewhat new to our community. Celebrating moments...that's what we did last night. We went around the table and though we don't know Erin well, everyone offered a toast...toasted what they appreciated about her or how they look forward to getting to know her better...
It was reciprocal toasting, after each toast, Erin responded...so then we had to toast the original toastee (is that even a word?)
Off to Orcas...
Last night a few of us celebrated Erin's birthday. Erin is somewhat new to our community. Celebrating moments...that's what we did last night. We went around the table and though we don't know Erin well, everyone offered a toast...toasted what they appreciated about her or how they look forward to getting to know her better...
It was reciprocal toasting, after each toast, Erin responded...so then we had to toast the original toastee (is that even a word?)
Off to Orcas...
Tuesday, July 12, 2005
Skydiving
Yesterday Rich and I and Alex went to the Snohomish airport to watch Nicole and a group of her friends skydive. They went up in four different loads. Nicole was in the last load so we were there until 7:00 pm. What an awesome experience. As we watched each load go, climb, jump and land. I really wanted to do it. It was too expensive otherwise I would have gone with my daughter. You jump in tandem with an instructor. My daughter's anxiety grew with each load that went up and came back. By the time she was on the plane she started to cry she was so afraid, then she said her instructor had to peel her hands away from the door to jump! She said once they jumped it was awesome! She also said she is glad she did it but will never do it again...
I love her spirit...
I love her courage...
I love her persistence...
I love her honesty with fears...
I love bonding with her in these moments...
I love her spirit...
I love her courage...
I love her persistence...
I love her honesty with fears...
I love bonding with her in these moments...
Monday, July 11, 2005
Random goings on
Today I am cleaning my house. I started on Saturday. It is therapeutic to clean out closets, scrub toilets, paint a bathroom desperately in need. I don't know if we will get to the painting today though. It's ready to be painted. Our life gets so full at times it is hard to slow down and enjoy being home. We have gone in and out of being very busy and having house guests. It's nice to be home, have no one here and get some much needed cleaning and purging done.
At four o'clock today I am going to watch my 25 year old daughter sky dive. It is her friend's birthday party, a group of friends jumping out of a plane. Nicole called me a few weeks ago to tell me she would be jumping and wanted to know if I would make sure to be praying. I am going to watch and pray...she is very adventuresome, I would like to think she gets that from me but somehow she comes by it quite naturally, I cannot imagine jumping out of a plane, it sounds exhilarating, but I don't think I could bring myself to actually do it.
Last week I joined a group of women from VCC in an eight week group called Simple Spirituality. You can go to off-the-map.org and check it out. It's formed around 7 practices, this last week our practice was God is good, I will practice trusting Him with my life...
Each week we come back to report how that practice influenced us, what we noticed about God, ourselves, etc...I was happy when a couple of women initiated facilitating this group. I was a part of a SS group a couple of years ago. The group helps me to slow down, notice God in the everyday, notice my response to God and to others...
One thing I have discovered about me is that I need places, spaces, to center my life. To slow down and practice incorporating my beliefs into my real life, SS helps me do that in community with others trying to do the same...I can let myself get so busy, do so many things, that I will forget to slow down and notice the Kingdom around me, I know I am in this process of learning to live my life oriented toward God and His kingdom for the long haul so this is a way for me to pace myself, to center and remember what this is all for...
I told you this would be a random post...
Rich and I and Alex are going on vacation next week, another way to center, we are going to my sister's house on Orcas Island. I haven't been to her house yet, they bought it last summer. I hear it is very fun, there will be lots of hiking, sailing, crabbing, good food and the like. Some of our friends are coming up while we are there so I am looking forward to the time away...
Got to get back to cleaning...
At four o'clock today I am going to watch my 25 year old daughter sky dive. It is her friend's birthday party, a group of friends jumping out of a plane. Nicole called me a few weeks ago to tell me she would be jumping and wanted to know if I would make sure to be praying. I am going to watch and pray...she is very adventuresome, I would like to think she gets that from me but somehow she comes by it quite naturally, I cannot imagine jumping out of a plane, it sounds exhilarating, but I don't think I could bring myself to actually do it.
Last week I joined a group of women from VCC in an eight week group called Simple Spirituality. You can go to off-the-map.org and check it out. It's formed around 7 practices, this last week our practice was God is good, I will practice trusting Him with my life...
Each week we come back to report how that practice influenced us, what we noticed about God, ourselves, etc...I was happy when a couple of women initiated facilitating this group. I was a part of a SS group a couple of years ago. The group helps me to slow down, notice God in the everyday, notice my response to God and to others...
One thing I have discovered about me is that I need places, spaces, to center my life. To slow down and practice incorporating my beliefs into my real life, SS helps me do that in community with others trying to do the same...I can let myself get so busy, do so many things, that I will forget to slow down and notice the Kingdom around me, I know I am in this process of learning to live my life oriented toward God and His kingdom for the long haul so this is a way for me to pace myself, to center and remember what this is all for...
I told you this would be a random post...
Rich and I and Alex are going on vacation next week, another way to center, we are going to my sister's house on Orcas Island. I haven't been to her house yet, they bought it last summer. I hear it is very fun, there will be lots of hiking, sailing, crabbing, good food and the like. Some of our friends are coming up while we are there so I am looking forward to the time away...
Got to get back to cleaning...
Saturday, July 02, 2005
A Visitation of Sorts
Thursday evening a group of us got together to begin plans to put some feet to what our community is calling Turning Point. TP a new arm of ministry that cares about serving the poor. Though we have big dreams, we realize we have to start small and are committed to the long haul, to let things grow over time. What we do know is that this is who we are to be, the reason we exist.
We met for a meal before our planning time. We had finished dinner, and we were taking turns noticing where we have been and where we are heading on our journey together. Jim talked about the Shalom of God, the sense of wellness and putting things to right that comes from God. We each had a glass of wine and had broke bread, we were about to pray and take communion together when we looked up and a man was standing at the head of the table.
He had come in without us noticing. He asked if we had any food to spare. He and his family were homeless, living in their van. We got up and began to gather up food, we had food in our kitchen, leftovers from our dinner...while we were gathering food, he told a bit of his story. We gave him a number for the homeless shelter we partner with, he was overwhelmed, thanked us, asked if we had any gas vouchers as he used all his gas running his engine at night to keep his family warm.
We gave him a few dollars for gas and he went on his way, very thankful.
We sat stunned by what had just occurred. It was a holy moment. NT Wright calls these moments "thin places" between heaven and earth. We savored the moment, prayed, took communion and our meeting ended up very productive in light of the experience we had together.
Here is a Scripture I have been thinking about for years...
A Full Life in the Emptiest of Places
10If you are generous with the hungry
and start giving yourselves to the down--and-out,
Your lives will begin to glow in the darkness,
your shadowed lives will be bathed in sunlight.
11I will always show you where to go.
I'll give you a full life in the emptiest of places--
firm muscles, strong bones.
You'll be like a well-watered garden,
a gurgling spring that never runs dry.
12You'll use the old rubble of past lives to build anew,
rebuild the foundations from out of your past.
You'll be known as those who can fix anything,
restore old ruins, rebuild and renovate,
make the community livable again.
I hold on to this as a mission statement for us...God is very good
We met for a meal before our planning time. We had finished dinner, and we were taking turns noticing where we have been and where we are heading on our journey together. Jim talked about the Shalom of God, the sense of wellness and putting things to right that comes from God. We each had a glass of wine and had broke bread, we were about to pray and take communion together when we looked up and a man was standing at the head of the table.
He had come in without us noticing. He asked if we had any food to spare. He and his family were homeless, living in their van. We got up and began to gather up food, we had food in our kitchen, leftovers from our dinner...while we were gathering food, he told a bit of his story. We gave him a number for the homeless shelter we partner with, he was overwhelmed, thanked us, asked if we had any gas vouchers as he used all his gas running his engine at night to keep his family warm.
We gave him a few dollars for gas and he went on his way, very thankful.
We sat stunned by what had just occurred. It was a holy moment. NT Wright calls these moments "thin places" between heaven and earth. We savored the moment, prayed, took communion and our meeting ended up very productive in light of the experience we had together.
Here is a Scripture I have been thinking about for years...
A Full Life in the Emptiest of Places
10If you are generous with the hungry
and start giving yourselves to the down--and-out,
Your lives will begin to glow in the darkness,
your shadowed lives will be bathed in sunlight.
11I will always show you where to go.
I'll give you a full life in the emptiest of places--
firm muscles, strong bones.
You'll be like a well-watered garden,
a gurgling spring that never runs dry.
12You'll use the old rubble of past lives to build anew,
rebuild the foundations from out of your past.
You'll be known as those who can fix anything,
restore old ruins, rebuild and renovate,
make the community livable again.
I hold on to this as a mission statement for us...God is very good
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Weddings
I am officiating my niece's (actually my second cousin but like to think of her as my niece) wedding tonight. It should be fun, they are a very sweet couple, mid 20's, both from Montana, so family members from both sides have come for the wedding...many of my family members will be in attendance as well.
I actually like officiating weddings, whether they are people I know well or don't know at all...for me, it is an honor to be with people as they begin this season of their life. Last weekend I officiated a wedding for a couple I did not know. The week of the wedding the bride's mother passed. They had the memorial on Friday and the wedding on Saturday. They did such a beautiful job under very sad circumstances, it was a beautiful wedding. I think this is why I love pastoring, you get to be with people during the most intimate times of their lives, somehow I find Jesus there, right in the middle of these times...for me these are most holy, sacred times...
I actually like officiating weddings, whether they are people I know well or don't know at all...for me, it is an honor to be with people as they begin this season of their life. Last weekend I officiated a wedding for a couple I did not know. The week of the wedding the bride's mother passed. They had the memorial on Friday and the wedding on Saturday. They did such a beautiful job under very sad circumstances, it was a beautiful wedding. I think this is why I love pastoring, you get to be with people during the most intimate times of their lives, somehow I find Jesus there, right in the middle of these times...for me these are most holy, sacred times...
Monday, June 20, 2005
Values inventory
Working on trying to define what our community values...how to put those values into words...we have unspoken and spoken values, so doing a bit of inventory to see what currently is the perception of our values....
If you want to take a crack at it, I would love to hear from you...tell me what you think our community values -- just off the top of your head, there is no right or wrong to this...
If you want to take a crack at it, I would love to hear from you...tell me what you think our community values -- just off the top of your head, there is no right or wrong to this...
Friday, June 10, 2005
Noticing 2
I sat with a woman today who is gay. She is in an eight year committed relationship, had a committal service six months ago. As we talked, I couldn't answer how she would be received in our congregation. Would they be welcomed? Would they be accepted? She has faith in God, raised in a Christian tradition but does not feel welcome in most churches....
How are we to be with this? There are so many complexities to think through with this issue...
The issue I see is at some point, in a center set system, where people are welcome at whatever point they are in their journey they will eventually run into our belief that celibate singleness and faithful heterosexual marriage is God's design...what happens then?
I read an article today on Cedar Ridge's site, (Brian McLaren is the founding pastor) you could read their position if you are interested here: http://www.crcc.org/content.php?ContentID=154
I think we will have to wrestle with this issue many times over, don't know how it will look, but what does it really mean to say we welcome and accept all people?
Rambling today...
How are we to be with this? There are so many complexities to think through with this issue...
The issue I see is at some point, in a center set system, where people are welcome at whatever point they are in their journey they will eventually run into our belief that celibate singleness and faithful heterosexual marriage is God's design...what happens then?
I read an article today on Cedar Ridge's site, (Brian McLaren is the founding pastor) you could read their position if you are interested here: http://www.crcc.org/content.php?ContentID=154
I think we will have to wrestle with this issue many times over, don't know how it will look, but what does it really mean to say we welcome and accept all people?
Rambling today...
Thursday, June 09, 2005
Noticing
On Sunday I asked folks if they would practice "noticing the Kingdom" this week...pray a prayer daily to notice where God is already...my friends Jim and Barb call it "bumping into God"...so, I have prayed that prayer every morning and I honestly did not have much success in noticing...until this morning, I prayed again, went about getting ready for the day, and in the shower, it came flooding to me, so much I had to keep up with my mind...here are some things that came to me...
I noticed God:
this morning when the sun was shining, I was reminded that there will be a day when the light from God will never stop shining, I felt the future come into my present...
working in my son's first grade class, I noticed God prompted me to pray for each child as I helped them one by one do an art project, I prayed specific things for each of them...
we had dinner with a man this week, who probably would not consider himself a person of faith, as he relayed a story to us, he began to cry, I knew I was sitting with God in that moment, that God was somehow, in some mysterious way, touching this man with His love...
On Sunday I ran into a man in our facility's parking lot that asked me for money, I said no...I didn't have any money on me, and truthfully, I was irritated...
I found out that he had been in the building asking for money, and someone took him over to a box we throw change into for the poor, there was about $6.00 in change, she gave it to the man...that's Kingdom to me, Matthew 25...
Yesterday a.m. I was with a group of women who commit 2 hours a week to pray together for our faith community, a thin space, between heaven and earth happens...
I have been not so great with my husband lately, actually pretty #%@$& with him and he treats me with kindness, respect and trys to find out what's got me so uptight...so Jesus like I think...
There was more that came to me, I think it's cool that after a fews days of asking and paying some attention to trying to notice, it like kicked in and thoughts and images came like a flood...
Have you ever had that experience?
I noticed God:
this morning when the sun was shining, I was reminded that there will be a day when the light from God will never stop shining, I felt the future come into my present...
working in my son's first grade class, I noticed God prompted me to pray for each child as I helped them one by one do an art project, I prayed specific things for each of them...
we had dinner with a man this week, who probably would not consider himself a person of faith, as he relayed a story to us, he began to cry, I knew I was sitting with God in that moment, that God was somehow, in some mysterious way, touching this man with His love...
On Sunday I ran into a man in our facility's parking lot that asked me for money, I said no...I didn't have any money on me, and truthfully, I was irritated...
I found out that he had been in the building asking for money, and someone took him over to a box we throw change into for the poor, there was about $6.00 in change, she gave it to the man...that's Kingdom to me, Matthew 25...
Yesterday a.m. I was with a group of women who commit 2 hours a week to pray together for our faith community, a thin space, between heaven and earth happens...
I have been not so great with my husband lately, actually pretty #%@$& with him and he treats me with kindness, respect and trys to find out what's got me so uptight...so Jesus like I think...
There was more that came to me, I think it's cool that after a fews days of asking and paying some attention to trying to notice, it like kicked in and thoughts and images came like a flood...
Have you ever had that experience?
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Pharisees
We are teaching through Matthew 5-7 on Sundays. The Sermon on the Mount. Some folk say this is Jesus' inaugural Address for the Kingdom. As much as I was excited to spend time with this Scripture I have to admit, I find it very difficult.
It is difficult because as I study it, meditate on it, pray on it, I realize that in many ways I am a Pharisee. I find it hard to teach, because in faith communities I think it is so easy for us to overlook the Pharisee that might be hanging out in our own hearts.
I also find difficulty in trying to convey Jesus message as a lifestyle, a lifestyle that is empowered by his very Spirit in order to follow him in a way that would produce the kind of person the Sermon speaks of...
I find we so easily resort to the "behavior", "sin" without looking at it as the symptom, the why of the behavior, the sin, and then having the grace and patience within the community to come alongside and walk out sometimes very deep seated brokenness...
One thing I am convinced of, if we don't allow Jesus in to the places of our heart to bring healing, deliverance, salvation that are still dead, or asleep to him, we don't have much hope of real change..it seems to me it is a gradual waking up to the reality of the kingdom...I asked folks to join me in a simple prayer each day this week..
Lord will you show me your kingdom reality today...
I hope we will see it...
It is difficult because as I study it, meditate on it, pray on it, I realize that in many ways I am a Pharisee. I find it hard to teach, because in faith communities I think it is so easy for us to overlook the Pharisee that might be hanging out in our own hearts.
I also find difficulty in trying to convey Jesus message as a lifestyle, a lifestyle that is empowered by his very Spirit in order to follow him in a way that would produce the kind of person the Sermon speaks of...
I find we so easily resort to the "behavior", "sin" without looking at it as the symptom, the why of the behavior, the sin, and then having the grace and patience within the community to come alongside and walk out sometimes very deep seated brokenness...
One thing I am convinced of, if we don't allow Jesus in to the places of our heart to bring healing, deliverance, salvation that are still dead, or asleep to him, we don't have much hope of real change..it seems to me it is a gradual waking up to the reality of the kingdom...I asked folks to join me in a simple prayer each day this week..
Lord will you show me your kingdom reality today...
I hope we will see it...
Monday, May 30, 2005
Several Beautiful Stories Running Together
At our women's retreat earlier this month Kim led us in a journaling exercise to think about the last little while and write about a beautiful story, a moment or moments you want to capture and savor....I have had many moments this weekend to savor so here goes...
It started out earlier in the week when my mom insisted I take her sofa. She has moved into a smaller place and needed to get rid of her sofa. Rich and I have been looking for new living room furniture since last October. We have looked and looked but have not wanted to spend the money. Our sofa and love seat for those of you that have not been to our home, sinks to the floor, if you have a bad back it's almost impossible to get up once you've sat down...We did not want/nor could we spend a lot of money...
when my mom offered her sofa, I said no, as it wasn't something I would choose. We decided to take it to put in our family room (another story, the infamous Mr. B. Chewed our sofa in the family room beyond repair)...When Rich brought my mom's sofa home we put it in the living room just to see...
It brightened up our living room...We thought, hmmm, not bad, so we moved our living room furniture down to the family room and had the new sofa in the living room...
So, Friday afternoon we went to the Memorial Weekend Sale at Pier 1 and there was a sofa that we had eyed before on sale for 1/2 price, so we ended up buying it as a love seat, the wicker furniture was also on sale so we got a new arm chair as well, we got a new living room for way less than we thought we would have to spend...
Saturday we spent the entire day cleaning and rearranging our house, did a ton of laundry...it felt so nice, we have not had the time or energy to pay attention to our house in 7 months!
We had company for dinner, the first time other than our kids since last fall...something Rich and I have both really missed, we love to have people over for a meal...
Sunday I tried a different teaching method at the Vineyard, showed a video by Rob Bell than discussed what people saw as themes and what they thought about it, I think it worked well...I love to hear people think out loud, and I like to be in the room listening to different views and perspectives --letting them be there with all the tension and all, no one had to have the answers, I liked it. I wouldn't do it every Sunday, but would like to incorporate that method once in awhile.
Sunday evening we went to an engagement party for my daughter's best friend. I am going to officiate the wedding next March in Thailand. It was really fun to be with all of these young people from so many different worlds. As we were leaving, the bride to be and her father told me how much they appreciated Rich and I being willing to come to Thailand for the wedding. They are paying our travel expenses as part of the wedding budget...I told them we were thankful for the opportunity...I don't imagine Rich and I would have ever planned a vacation to a southeast island in Thailand...
This weekend, I receive and hold as a gift from God:
new furniture
having friends over for a meal
the nagel's moving home
being invited into my 25 year old daughter's world to celebrate with her and her friends
getting a vacation to Thailand
belonging to an awesome faith community
having a great husband and 7 year old to live with...not to mention the not-so-obedient Mr. B....
It started out earlier in the week when my mom insisted I take her sofa. She has moved into a smaller place and needed to get rid of her sofa. Rich and I have been looking for new living room furniture since last October. We have looked and looked but have not wanted to spend the money. Our sofa and love seat for those of you that have not been to our home, sinks to the floor, if you have a bad back it's almost impossible to get up once you've sat down...We did not want/nor could we spend a lot of money...
when my mom offered her sofa, I said no, as it wasn't something I would choose. We decided to take it to put in our family room (another story, the infamous Mr. B. Chewed our sofa in the family room beyond repair)...When Rich brought my mom's sofa home we put it in the living room just to see...
It brightened up our living room...We thought, hmmm, not bad, so we moved our living room furniture down to the family room and had the new sofa in the living room...
So, Friday afternoon we went to the Memorial Weekend Sale at Pier 1 and there was a sofa that we had eyed before on sale for 1/2 price, so we ended up buying it as a love seat, the wicker furniture was also on sale so we got a new arm chair as well, we got a new living room for way less than we thought we would have to spend...
Saturday we spent the entire day cleaning and rearranging our house, did a ton of laundry...it felt so nice, we have not had the time or energy to pay attention to our house in 7 months!
We had company for dinner, the first time other than our kids since last fall...something Rich and I have both really missed, we love to have people over for a meal...
Sunday I tried a different teaching method at the Vineyard, showed a video by Rob Bell than discussed what people saw as themes and what they thought about it, I think it worked well...I love to hear people think out loud, and I like to be in the room listening to different views and perspectives --letting them be there with all the tension and all, no one had to have the answers, I liked it. I wouldn't do it every Sunday, but would like to incorporate that method once in awhile.
Sunday evening we went to an engagement party for my daughter's best friend. I am going to officiate the wedding next March in Thailand. It was really fun to be with all of these young people from so many different worlds. As we were leaving, the bride to be and her father told me how much they appreciated Rich and I being willing to come to Thailand for the wedding. They are paying our travel expenses as part of the wedding budget...I told them we were thankful for the opportunity...I don't imagine Rich and I would have ever planned a vacation to a southeast island in Thailand...
This weekend, I receive and hold as a gift from God:
new furniture
having friends over for a meal
the nagel's moving home
being invited into my 25 year old daughter's world to celebrate with her and her friends
getting a vacation to Thailand
belonging to an awesome faith community
having a great husband and 7 year old to live with...not to mention the not-so-obedient Mr. B....
Friday, May 27, 2005
Lectio -Matthew 7:21-23
"Knowing the correct password--saying "Master, Master,' for instance--isn't going to get you anywhere with me. What is required is serious obedience--doing what my Father wills. I can see it now--at the Final Judgment thousands strutting up to me and saying, "Master, we preached the Message, we bashed the demons, our God-sponsored projects had everyone talking.' And do you know what I am going to say? "You missed the boat. All you did was use me to make yourselves important. You don't impress me one bit. You're out of here.'
I don't know about you but these words make me slow down and think about why I/we do what I/we do...
I am thinking about this in light of a meeting I went to yesterday with Sharon and Ingrid. It was the "Back to School Consortium" in Shoreline. There are 1899 children in the Shoreline School District that qualify for free or assistance lunch programs. In order to qualify you have to be living pretty close to or below the poverty line...Shoreline is a city with a population of 53k
This consortium is made up of people from the Center for Human Services, (a non-profit or down the street), family advocates from the school district and some volunteers that work with other low-income issues...
They plan a back to school event in August that includes school supplies, hair cuts, hygeine products, and clothes from the clothing bank as well as food and fun...
Last year they served 600 children and youth, this year the goal is 1000...
Needless to say they need a lot of donated items, money and volunteers...Costco gave them 600 backpacks...they are contacting businesses and churches to help...
This struck me...they have a complete database of churches in Shoreline, they called all of them over the past few weeks and not one church returned their call...
They asked us if we had any hints of how to get through to the churches...
They asked me if I knew of any quarterly or so meeting where all the pastors got together...I said I did not, that we have been in Shoreline one year and have never recieved an invitation (which doesn't mean it's not happening)...
One woman made a comment "wouldn't that be a powerful force"
This sent me spinning...churches, meeting together, maybe quarterly, pastors, leaders or anyone interested in seeing what needs are in the community and how we could join together to serve -- that would be a powerful force...I bet at the very minimum we could provide school supplies for 1000 kids that are in our Parish...
Back to the Lectio...Jesus help us to never use you to make us feel important, help us to go forward with the attitude of humility, which reminds me of the Paul's hymn in Philippians 2...
The church is the church only when it exists for others. . . . The church must share in the secular problems of ordinary human life, not dominating, but helping and serving. . . . It must not underestimate the importance of human example which has its origin in the humanity of Jesus. http://www.cresourcei.org/kenosis.html
I don't know about you but these words make me slow down and think about why I/we do what I/we do...
I am thinking about this in light of a meeting I went to yesterday with Sharon and Ingrid. It was the "Back to School Consortium" in Shoreline. There are 1899 children in the Shoreline School District that qualify for free or assistance lunch programs. In order to qualify you have to be living pretty close to or below the poverty line...Shoreline is a city with a population of 53k
This consortium is made up of people from the Center for Human Services, (a non-profit or down the street), family advocates from the school district and some volunteers that work with other low-income issues...
They plan a back to school event in August that includes school supplies, hair cuts, hygeine products, and clothes from the clothing bank as well as food and fun...
Last year they served 600 children and youth, this year the goal is 1000...
Needless to say they need a lot of donated items, money and volunteers...Costco gave them 600 backpacks...they are contacting businesses and churches to help...
This struck me...they have a complete database of churches in Shoreline, they called all of them over the past few weeks and not one church returned their call...
They asked us if we had any hints of how to get through to the churches...
They asked me if I knew of any quarterly or so meeting where all the pastors got together...I said I did not, that we have been in Shoreline one year and have never recieved an invitation (which doesn't mean it's not happening)...
One woman made a comment "wouldn't that be a powerful force"
This sent me spinning...churches, meeting together, maybe quarterly, pastors, leaders or anyone interested in seeing what needs are in the community and how we could join together to serve -- that would be a powerful force...I bet at the very minimum we could provide school supplies for 1000 kids that are in our Parish...
Back to the Lectio...Jesus help us to never use you to make us feel important, help us to go forward with the attitude of humility, which reminds me of the Paul's hymn in Philippians 2...
The church is the church only when it exists for others. . . . The church must share in the secular problems of ordinary human life, not dominating, but helping and serving. . . . It must not underestimate the importance of human example which has its origin in the humanity of Jesus. http://www.cresourcei.org/kenosis.html
Monday, May 23, 2005
Catch Up
This week I will catch up at the office. Catch up with people, paperwork and finalize our second grant proposal. I also need to begin the planning process of how we are going to re-organize our community's governance.
Last week I was in Nashville, Ft Wayne and Chicago. A good trip. Off The Map is developing a hearing and it is a much needed corrective to the way we view evangelism. I had a lot of alone time in my hotel and walking around Nashville. I actually feel like my batteries got recharged.
The weekend before leaving I went on retreat with about 25 women from our church. It was a good time. When women go on retreat, it can be a bit intense, but it was a good intense. The setting, the woman that led us in journal exercises and the amount of down time we had made for a good time.
Yesterday was Rich's birthday. We had a nice dinner and some friends invited Alex to spend the night so we could have the evening and today together...It was nice to catch up with Rich. I am practicing momentology (thanks Barb)...I am cherishing and holding the moments of solitude and just being, especially with Rich...
I need to study for the next few weeks of teaching at VCC. We are teaching through Matthew 5,6 & 7...I would be interested to hear from some of you that read my blog, to hear some thoughts on the following:
What could teaching look like in our context at our Sunday gathering if it wasn't always (maybe this was just one way) a person teaching for 20-30 minutes? Any creative ideas? Send them my way...If you want just email them to me, I really would be interested...
Peace
Last week I was in Nashville, Ft Wayne and Chicago. A good trip. Off The Map is developing a hearing and it is a much needed corrective to the way we view evangelism. I had a lot of alone time in my hotel and walking around Nashville. I actually feel like my batteries got recharged.
The weekend before leaving I went on retreat with about 25 women from our church. It was a good time. When women go on retreat, it can be a bit intense, but it was a good intense. The setting, the woman that led us in journal exercises and the amount of down time we had made for a good time.
Yesterday was Rich's birthday. We had a nice dinner and some friends invited Alex to spend the night so we could have the evening and today together...It was nice to catch up with Rich. I am practicing momentology (thanks Barb)...I am cherishing and holding the moments of solitude and just being, especially with Rich...
I need to study for the next few weeks of teaching at VCC. We are teaching through Matthew 5,6 & 7...I would be interested to hear from some of you that read my blog, to hear some thoughts on the following:
What could teaching look like in our context at our Sunday gathering if it wasn't always (maybe this was just one way) a person teaching for 20-30 minutes? Any creative ideas? Send them my way...If you want just email them to me, I really would be interested...
Peace
Monday, May 09, 2005
Returning to Life
Life is finally getting back to normal. Mother's day was (other than a slight blip) peaceful. Low key, after our morning gathering, we went to lunch with 4 of our children and my mother. My mother is doing very well. Still recovering, and in a transition to her new home, but all said and done, she continues to heal.
I am looking forward to the next week. On Thursday I leave for our community's women's retreat. We are going to Whidbey Island. It will be a time of being together, journaling, worship and prayer. There are about 30 of us going. I am looking forward to a couple of days of retreat. On Monday I leave for Nashville, Ft Wayne and Chicago with Off The Map. The time away will be nice, even though busy.
We finished our first grant proposal for our new arm of ministry. We will know by June 1st if it is accepted. Our new arm of ministry will be the container for social services to our greater community. It will include our work with low-income apartment communities, the homeless shelter, and resources for marriages in the areas of education, coaching and counseling.
I am so happy to get back to life. Nothing like an emotional roller coaster ride to throw you off kilter for a time.
That's it for now. Peace
I am looking forward to the next week. On Thursday I leave for our community's women's retreat. We are going to Whidbey Island. It will be a time of being together, journaling, worship and prayer. There are about 30 of us going. I am looking forward to a couple of days of retreat. On Monday I leave for Nashville, Ft Wayne and Chicago with Off The Map. The time away will be nice, even though busy.
We finished our first grant proposal for our new arm of ministry. We will know by June 1st if it is accepted. Our new arm of ministry will be the container for social services to our greater community. It will include our work with low-income apartment communities, the homeless shelter, and resources for marriages in the areas of education, coaching and counseling.
I am so happy to get back to life. Nothing like an emotional roller coaster ride to throw you off kilter for a time.
That's it for now. Peace
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Perspective
Do you ever have days where you feel you've been run over or beat up? That was how I felt when I posted last. I had plans that night to watch a movie with 3 other women. We were going to watch I (heart) Huckabees together over some wine and snacks. So much intensity happened all day with regard to my family, by the time our girls night came I wasn't in good shape and wanted to cancel.
I also did not want to cancel as I was looking forward to spending time with some new friends. So, I went...
Driving there I was trying to decide how to answer the question, "how are you" would I say not good and leave it, would I say okay and leave it, or would I say not good and if you want to know why I will try to make it short...
The latter happened, and we talked and talked...
I love women. Many women I know have such a natural gift to listen with empathy, to think and ask questions that help you process, to offer compassion and wisdom.
I will say it again, I am wealthy, probably one of the richest women I know, not monetarily but with friendships...I think at the end of the day, when I go from this life to what is beyond, the friendships and relationships made here are what will qualify as richness.
thank you Jesus for the multitude of relationships you have brought into my life, too many to mention, but you know and I know and I am blessed...
I also did not want to cancel as I was looking forward to spending time with some new friends. So, I went...
Driving there I was trying to decide how to answer the question, "how are you" would I say not good and leave it, would I say okay and leave it, or would I say not good and if you want to know why I will try to make it short...
The latter happened, and we talked and talked...
I love women. Many women I know have such a natural gift to listen with empathy, to think and ask questions that help you process, to offer compassion and wisdom.
I will say it again, I am wealthy, probably one of the richest women I know, not monetarily but with friendships...I think at the end of the day, when I go from this life to what is beyond, the friendships and relationships made here are what will qualify as richness.
thank you Jesus for the multitude of relationships you have brought into my life, too many to mention, but you know and I know and I am blessed...
Thursday, April 28, 2005
It's been awhile
I have not posted much since my mother got sick back in March. To say the truth, I have wanted to blog but so much personal stuff has come up since my mother's illness I wasn't sure I wanted to put it out there. So, here goes some attempt. There is nothing like a life threatening illness or situation that will bring up every unresolved issue a large family has.
I have 4 siblings. I am second to the youngest. My mom and dad divorced when I was 19. The reason for the divorce, my dad at the time around age 54 was found having an affair with a 17 year old girl. The affair began when she was 15.
Those of you who are parents. How would you feel if your 15 year old daughter was having an affair with a 52 year old married man?
This is only the most minute crack in the ice to begin to tell the story of my childhood and beyond. Suffice to say that if all that happened back then in our home were happening today, my dad would probably be in prison for life.
What has come up on the past month with one sibling in particular is he doesn't remember any of it. He thinks we have exaggerated the story. My 3 other siblings don't deny it all happened. We have all chosen to deal with it in different ways. The 5 of us have never had occasion to discuss it. There have been side conversations with each other, but never the 5 of us all together for as an intense emotional time as this.
One night at the hospital, in the waiting room, there was some reminiscing going on about all the beatings my dad gave to my oldest brother. My brother was relating the times he had to go to the ER and then would go to my aunt's house and would have to lie to people about what happened, he would say he had been in a car accident or any number of other lies to cover for what my dad did. People were sort of laughing, at one point, I said, if he were doing that today he would be in prison...
This started an all out shouting match with my other brother who doesn't think anything too bad really happened. It wasn't pretty and I used some pretty bad language. The thing that put me over the edge, was when this sibling was asked if he would leave his 5 year old daughter with dad to which he replied, yes.
Since that evening, my relationship with my 3 older siblings has been strained. Both my brothers live out of town so are not here for the day to day caring for my mom.
My younger sister has asked the other 3 to respect her boundaries around having any sort of relationship with dad. I have asked for the same.
By the way, for many years I have worked on trying to figure out how to forgive my dad, and what kind of relationship I could have with him. Where I landed was I forgive him but any relationship I try to have with him does not work.
I am today labeled by at least 2 maybe the 3 older siblings as being childish, selfish and paranoid when it comes to my dad...
It is very painful to be misunderstood by people you love. It is also painful to want familial relationships to work and when they don't you have to let go...
So, I am grieving today...Grieving again some of the pain of my childhood, grieving the pain of watching my mother come so close to death and all she has/is going through, grieving my siblings lack of understanding and being slandered by them...
This is one of those times where I have to go deep into the Lord to ask His help to do what I cannot...I know in time this will pass, letting go of illusions, expectations, even in yourself (I did not react well in some of these situations)can be a hard road...
Kind of a downer post hey?
On the positive side, my mom will be moving from rehab to her new assisted living apartment on Monday!
Peace
I have 4 siblings. I am second to the youngest. My mom and dad divorced when I was 19. The reason for the divorce, my dad at the time around age 54 was found having an affair with a 17 year old girl. The affair began when she was 15.
Those of you who are parents. How would you feel if your 15 year old daughter was having an affair with a 52 year old married man?
This is only the most minute crack in the ice to begin to tell the story of my childhood and beyond. Suffice to say that if all that happened back then in our home were happening today, my dad would probably be in prison for life.
What has come up on the past month with one sibling in particular is he doesn't remember any of it. He thinks we have exaggerated the story. My 3 other siblings don't deny it all happened. We have all chosen to deal with it in different ways. The 5 of us have never had occasion to discuss it. There have been side conversations with each other, but never the 5 of us all together for as an intense emotional time as this.
One night at the hospital, in the waiting room, there was some reminiscing going on about all the beatings my dad gave to my oldest brother. My brother was relating the times he had to go to the ER and then would go to my aunt's house and would have to lie to people about what happened, he would say he had been in a car accident or any number of other lies to cover for what my dad did. People were sort of laughing, at one point, I said, if he were doing that today he would be in prison...
This started an all out shouting match with my other brother who doesn't think anything too bad really happened. It wasn't pretty and I used some pretty bad language. The thing that put me over the edge, was when this sibling was asked if he would leave his 5 year old daughter with dad to which he replied, yes.
Since that evening, my relationship with my 3 older siblings has been strained. Both my brothers live out of town so are not here for the day to day caring for my mom.
My younger sister has asked the other 3 to respect her boundaries around having any sort of relationship with dad. I have asked for the same.
By the way, for many years I have worked on trying to figure out how to forgive my dad, and what kind of relationship I could have with him. Where I landed was I forgive him but any relationship I try to have with him does not work.
I am today labeled by at least 2 maybe the 3 older siblings as being childish, selfish and paranoid when it comes to my dad...
It is very painful to be misunderstood by people you love. It is also painful to want familial relationships to work and when they don't you have to let go...
So, I am grieving today...Grieving again some of the pain of my childhood, grieving the pain of watching my mother come so close to death and all she has/is going through, grieving my siblings lack of understanding and being slandered by them...
This is one of those times where I have to go deep into the Lord to ask His help to do what I cannot...I know in time this will pass, letting go of illusions, expectations, even in yourself (I did not react well in some of these situations)can be a hard road...
Kind of a downer post hey?
On the positive side, my mom will be moving from rehab to her new assisted living apartment on Monday!
Peace
Friday, April 08, 2005
Amazing
My mom is fully awake and lucid! She was moved out of icu to a regular room and on Sunday will be discharged to rehab. What an amazing recovery! Thanks to everyone for your prayers and thoughts. Prayer plus her strong will to live pulled her through. I am thankful to Jesus for honoring her will to live. Thanks everyone
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